iTunes Executive Calls DMN ‘Disgusting’ and Demands an Apology to Every Female Reader…

In response to our recent article on the over-sensitive Lauren Mayberry of Chvrches, iTunes Content Acquisition and Partner Relations executive Kristin Rice Biba demanded that we apologize to her and every woman reading Digital Music News for our ‘disgusting’ coverage.

Here’s what she wrote, and here’s how we responded.




97 Responses

    • Esol Esek

      Some men don’t know the line between admiration and being rude. Some men do and deliberately cross for a host of reasons that women mostly ignore, usually past dealings with manipulative women. Some men are just angry they can’t get as hot and pliable a woman as they think they deserve. And a lot of women spend their lives chasing a perfect man they[‘re not going to find and haven’t earned.

      Sexual politics is so far out of hand, that you can’t make any broad statements. Of course violence is a crime.
      Her reaction to some guy saying he wanted to make love to her is pathetically overdone, though the other statements were over the line.

      Women are but half of humanity. They don’t get to set the spoken boundaries for all of society, except they rule US divorce courts in most states. The power women exercise plays a part in male hate. THink about that someday Kristen and the singer for Churches, who, yeah, is in the public eye, and whining because a dude wants to have sex with her, which she is selling for money in the media? Cmon. Get some humor and face reality. If you weren’t selling sex, you’d be selling talent, and you might come up short.

      Kristen reminds me of the typical corporate cog – needs to make a big statement about something since she does nothing of value. It’s more about her need to flex muscie than a real issue. Priscilla made valid points. The overreactions to sexism and racism in Western society are as out of hand as the real racists and sexists and cloud the issue miserably, mostly just so the whiners can hear themselves bleat.

  1. Kristian Mortensen
    Kristian Mortensen

    Wauw – first off you made a really harsh mistake – and now you are not admitting to it.
    Short term ad fulled clicks attention – long term loss of attention from serious music business interested.

  2. Visitor

    Like I said the first time around:
    You’re a failure as an artist if you don’t have a decent amount of absolutely insane stalkers.
    It’s the price to pay and the flip side of living a public life.
    It affects men and women alike, and you should get another job if you can’t handle it. Many do, and there’s no shame in that.
    But please stop the whining.

    • Conrad Black

      The point of Lauren Mayberry’s article is that this kind of behaviour is not acceptable. Even if women have been subjected to this for tens of thousands of years, it still isn’t acceptable. Because something is the norm, it doesn’t mean that it is fair, or reasonable, or acceptable. Subjecting women to unwanted, often aggressive or violent, sexual advances is something that should be pretty easy to stamp out. I’m not really sure how you can justify it as being ok.

      • Yves Villeneuve

        What’s your solution for easily stamping out this behaviour?

        If Lauren Mayberry is the victim of a criminal act, it is her responsibility as an adult to report it to the police. If she doesn’t she is allowing her assailants to strike again. The existence of criminals have existed for a very long time though I don’t see a speedy end to their existence.

        If the acts are considered abuse of Facebook’s terms of service, FA staff will delete the perpetrators’ accounts after an investigation following an actual complaint. Is Miss Mayberry feeling sympathetic toward her attackers therefore deciding not to report abuse? I doubt it. However the mechanism to reduce this behavior on Facebook is available to the victim.

        This is more the case of a so-called victim gaining sympathy for all the wrong reasons. The fact you are commenting, I sense you are writing an article about it.

    • You

      Well this is what you should say instead on your next time around then: true artists should define their WORK as successful or failed – not their fame/money. Unfortunately, these can be quite mutually exclusive.

      • Michele

        A douache bag is a douchebag and a bullshitter is a bullshitter
        Who’s next – this is pathetic twisted and completely unravelled
        You’ve all lost your ways with this article – yah need to move on no one is getting an apology
        It’s called a lesser of evil stand offs on budging no being the bigger person
        Nada fini done you’ll be purple – how’s this – agree to disagree and
        Let the complainers work thru there messes of righteousness and blah blah blah
        Okay got something more lessor of evil we can all harmonize on???

  3. Lane Dunlop
    Lane Dunlop

    I’ll be joining Kristen in unsubscribing. I’m not sure what point Ms. Kim was trying to make but what I got out of her “column” was:
    “Suck it up, Lauren. Accept the sexism that comes your way because, well, internet.”
    It is not okay because it is the internet. It is not okay in any forum. Sexism is sexism is sexism. DMN giving cover to sexist and threats of sexual violence is not okay. It’s “blame the victim” all over again.
    Lauren was right to say what she did. There is no excuse for those comments. I have a nine year old son. I don’t want him growing up to learn that sexism and racism is okay because it’s the internet. It’s not.
    “Women don’t make up the bulk of those who receive violent threats.”
    Are you serious? Every woman I know who has had any recognition or success in their work is the target of violent, sexist comments.
    Kristen was right to say what she did. DMN not only excused the comments that Lauren has received but you then wrote one of the most idiotic defenses of a shitty piece of link bait journalism. I worked with Kristen for years. She’s not knee-jerking this. You blew it, DMN.
    Let me know when that apology comes around.
    Lane Dunlop
    Hamilton, ON
    p.s. I like the box below that asks me to “Verify my humanity” in order to leave a comment. I’d like to see DMN and Ms. Kim demonstrate their humanity once in awhile instead of attacking everyone who disagrees with them and dismissing threats against successful women as the price of doing business.

    • Visitor

      “you then wrote one of the most idiotic defenses of a shitty piece of link bait journalism”
      Not everybody enjoys that type of language, Mr. Dunlop. Don’t think you can talk like that just because this is the internet.
      Why don’t you stop harassing Ms. Kim?
      Women are so weak, you know. They can’t handle stuff like this.

    • Priscilla Kim
      Priscilla Kim

      1) I’m not attacking anyone disagreeing with my views
      2) I’m sure Kristen had the best interest in mind for humanity when she asked for an apology.

    • Paul Resnikoff
      Paul Resnikoff

      Lane, you’re completely missing Priscilla’s point on ‘the bulk of violent threats’. Entire races and religions have suffered enormous amounts of violence and threats throughout history; I don’t need to get into it but the last few decades offer ample evidence of this.
      But it’s every day, as well. It’s the SUV driver surrounded and beaten by motorcyclists, it’s the gay person beaten to death on the streets in Russia. Just yesterday I was threatened with violence on the streets of Harlem because the guy didn’t like my shoes (yeah, seriously).
      Carving this out and saying it’s just a problem for women is completely misleading.

      • Tune Hunter
        Tune Hunter

        What forced you to be in Harlem! Long time ago I have purchased lollip production line in Harlem.
        We where robbed and that visit crosses my mind to this day.

      • lifer

        Woooo. Scary…

        “Streets of Harlem.” Perhaps a more subtle casting of aspersions than the typical Internet fare? Conscious or unconscious?

      • Kell

        Here’s a little exercise to see if DMN’s position holds up: In all the points you make, replace the idea of “violence against women” with “violence against gays”, and see if you retain much popular support for your reasoning. …Or if that particular support base is one you care to have.

    • Amrish

      Do you even know the difference between xml and http? Or what they stand for without googling it?

  4. Rico

    I don’t think your article was appropriate or helpfull in anyway, Lauren didn’t ask for your advise and you gave it publicly, but you did it for yourself and to get attention, but you came across very badly.
    Bullies of all kinds should be called out and not just put up with, a hard skin is all well and good but kindness and openness are far more valuable, to be an artist sometimes requires an openness, and a sensitivity.
    It is the insensitve bullies that need your lecture, bit then that wouldn’t get so much attention would it, I don’t think you mean’t badly, but I really believe you should rethink you stance, and maybe apologise for a badly thought out article.

    • Visitor

      “a hard skin is all well and good but kindness and openness are far more valuable”
      Kindness and openness are nice if you want to survive as a human being, but hard skin is a must if you want to survive as an artist.
      If you’re kind and open in public, you will get robbed, mugged, raped, harassed and die as a junkie.
      Your choice.

      • Rico Sergeant
        Rico Sergeant

        No that is totally wrong, if your sensitive enough and kind enough then you can see beyond all the pain and fear that everyone is carrying, closing down is a choice that people choose to take rather than open up even more, its the easy route, rather than having to deal with whats going on inside they close down, you can be extremly powerful and strong whilst still remaining open and sensitive, once you start to close down you bring your humanity and all humanity onto a path that leads to even greater pain, closing down and becoming insensitive is like taking a drug it works for a while but in the end dimminishes you, and holds us all back, stay open and be free.

          • Rico Sergeant
            Rico Sergeant

            I do understand why you would say that, but I am not talking about how it was in the sixties, I’m talking about something very different, I’m not talking about letting people hurt you or not standing up for yourself, I’m talking about having a real courage, to have true courage requires you to be open. and a sensitivity to those around you, I am not saying its easy, I do understand why people prefer to close down sometimes, we all do it, but it is only because of our fear.

  5. Stupid

    This site has lost all credibility. It’s not about news but rather starting drama. I have been a loyal reader for years but the pessimism of the editor and the continuous drama that is displayed here is truly pathetic.
    Take a note from real and credible publications and then you will stop being looked at like a joke in conferences.

  6. discography

    I’m not far behind in dropping it out of my feed. It has such potential, but if I wanted to listen to someone’s rage soapbox to push their agenda and ear a few ad views with limited actual analysis I’d just turn on Fox News.

  7. TuneHunter

    I was afraid that it was related to my rape and prostitution posts.
    Well this forum is the only hope for any progress in music bussiness therefore I hope we will not demolish it with small talk and politics.
    On another note Apple, with all the credit for being #1 digital merchant, is responsible for current mess and stagnation.
    It was Apple team in 2008 that, out of usual selfishness, showed fingers to discovery services. Shazam and other ID friends lost another five years in prostitution and music rape zone.

  8. Concerned

    I too am done with this publication.

    and it’s too bad because we need strong smart voices with level reason to be making the case for content creators. If only you could drop the need to be dramatic and instead offer the needed reporting and insight, we’d all be helped.

    However, this kind of bantering and drama-making really is the lowest level of seeking click-thru, but witHout the content needed to gain it for content’s sake.
    Sadly, you’re hurting the cause you set out to support.
    You also clearly lack the feminist critique – even on the most basic level – to discuss these matters in a productive way. You sound like a child.

    • Tune Hunter
      Tune Hunter

      Go to Mark Mulligan’s blog – he is very nice and polite.
      He also spends a lot of time and is very excited with obvious loosers and demolishers of the industry.
      I assure you, the atmosphere is very pleasent, but there is no hope for breakthroughs out of that forum.

    • Visitor

      “I too am done with this publication.”
      The problem with you and the other drama queens here is that you don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.
      If you stick your nose out in public, people will stand in line to cut it off.
      That goes for everybody, not just artists. Ask any politician. Whining is the last thing you wanna do.
      Roll your eyes and spend your time on something else. 99% of all nutcases go away when you ignore them. Let the police handle the rest.

  9. Visitor

    I stand with DMN.
    Imagine Miley or Kanye West whining about the harrasment they get which I can assure you is a MILLION times worse then what this cry baby is getting.
    This made me dislike CHVRCHES.

    • Visitor

      “Imagine Miley or Kanye West whining about the harrasment they get which I can assure you is a MILLION times worse then what this cry baby is getting.”
      The Miley haters are the worst I’ve seen for years.

  10. Visitor

    Wow, Kristin must’ve got a promotion since last I talked to her.
    And LANE! We all miss talking to you reppin’ the great north country!

  11. Visitor

    Hold on. This is the real news:
    An Apple executive is using Gmail (Google) to communicate with one of the most popular music blogs.

  12. hippydog

    Quote Priscilla Kim “Rather then draw attention to these undeserving weirdos, who are only going to troll her even more (because this is the internet, after all) she could have…. ”
    heres the crux of the matter..
    Paraphrasing the statement above it reads “This is the internet, there is nothing you can do about, so you should just ignore it”
    that isnt what you should do..
    How many history examples do you want? 3? 10? 500?
    I’m pretty sure every single person reading this can think of at least three examples..
    advising people to ignore the issue (especially from a position of power) makes YOU a part of the problem..

    Quote ” is a trite representation of a shallow misreading of the article”
    or.. could it be a misrepresentation of the writer of said article?
    heres the thing.. when you call yourself “digital music NEWS”, that word “NEWS” has a pretty important connotation.
    When you copy and paste only parts of another article with out correctly referencing it, you are misrepresenting the publication.
    When you make a personal opinion but state it as a fact.. you are misrepresenting the publication.
    this REALLY goes against the grain (of what people expect when they think ‘News’)
    so.. A simple “in my opinion…” should be used the next time you decide to editorialize..

    in my opinion 😉

  13. Yves Villeneuve
    Yves Villeneuve

    I think we should remember is, if Lauren Mayberry truly felt threatened she would have reported it to the proper authorities. She must have been receiving these types of comments for quite some time and is aware of the risk level for not reporting it.
    Axiom: the more successful one becomes the more attention you get from rational fans, idiots and stalkers. It may only be worth reporting to police if they appear to be stalkers rather than the one-time idiot.
    I don’t agree with people making idiotic sexual approaches though I’m sure everyone at least chooses to be indifferent of others making simple adoring statements of how beautiful or sexy they are.
    I think artists are nearly as shallow if the only critiques they want to receive are related to their music. The artists can spend time filtering the type of critiques it wants to read and consider.

  14. AnAmusedGeek

    What gets me is everyone is focusing on the ‘internet’ side of things…
    Am I the only one concerned that we have neighbors, co-workers, etc. that actually _think_ this way? Its not like the whack jobs get any saner when they turn off the computer…
    As Paul mentioned, we see plenty of examples of how we’re ‘de-volving’ everyday on the news. Its pretty dam scary…

    • Bandit

      Yes, our neighbors think all sorts of vile and disgusting things. There is no crime (yet) for thinking of something that is unpopular, reprehensible, evil or even criminal.
      The internet is a part of this debate because it easily allows individuals to express those opinions anonymously without having to deal with the consequences.

  15. Pot calling the kettle
    Pot calling the kettle

    So it’s ok for apple to exploit workers in a foreign nation. It’s ok for apple to create fictional business entities overseas to avoid paying taxes.
    These activities aren’t illegal but arguably socially unacceptable at the very least. So the anonymous people spewing vile comments on a fan blog is worse.
    I just want to clear things up

  16. ja

    Ah, an employee of Apple shaming someone with corporate liberalism?! Truly can’t believe it…
    Sure, when their company is exposed for being a bunch of hypocritical, lying, threatening assholes, you’re the mean man promoting woman-beating.
    But hey Ms. equal rights, how ’bout your Chinese factories with suicide nets? Shed a tear for those people? How ’bout artists who Steve Jobs himself said he couldn’t believe he was getting away with the 70/30 iTunes rev share swindle?
    Go get your fucking coffee and make up ways with your shitty, annoying friends to hate on anyone who speaks their mind.

  17. Marisa

    Did anyone else not notice that Kristen never called the article “disgusting,” as both the headline and intro state she does? Unless they were quoting from an uncited paragraph, Kristen said she was “disgusted by [the] Lauren Mayberry article.”

    Besides accuracy, there is also a difference between these two statements. It’s not huge, but it’s there. And therein lies another underlying problem with both this article, the original article, and DMN: lazy, incendiary writing passing itself off as news.

    • Karen Allen

      I noticed this. If you’re going to take someone on for their words, get their words straight.

  18. And what

    Gotcha headlines, irresponsible/uninformed journalism, and irrelevant point of view. That’s what this site has become.

  19. Anonymous

    In the last year there have been more cyber-bullying influenced suicides than ever before. Look it up, it’s a lot more than you think. This is an issue that light needs to be shed on and people need to realize is not okay. Lauren started to do this, and I hope she continues to. And I would love it in Miley and Madonna and all of the other female public figures who have dealt with much worse would share what they’ve dealt with and make a stand against it.
    The stance DMN has publicly taken that this is not a problem is a classic example of blaming the victim. If the author still doesn’t know why what she wrote is offensive then I recommend her to do some research on cyber-bullying and feminism. If she wants to someday be a reporter then she should get used to researching topics she ‘a writing on.

  20. Gone

    Can anyone recommend a good site for music industry news? Due to this site’s lack of sensitivity I will be leaving it and never coming back.

  21. you what?

    Kristen emailed you from her personal account – she was in no way contacting you as a spokes-person for iTunes. To label her communication as such is vindictive. Because, as I’m sure DMN well knows, Apple are very sensitive with regards to their PR. Apple would never directly engage DMN in any communication I’m sure. Rightly so they let their lawyers take care of you. For this very reason no doubt.

    congratulations DMN. Every time I think there’s no way you could sink any lower (the original article in question being a prime example), you never fail but to take it to another sleezy level.

    • Paul Resnikoff
      Paul Resnikoff

      Be careful: you can’t turn your professional associations on and off like that. By that logic, if Jonathan Ive sends me a nasty note from an @gmail account, it’s just from ol’ Jonny? Sorry, it doesn’t work like that.

      And it’s spelled ‘sleazy’ (for next time).

  22. Caleb stone

    The chick from iTunes is a whiny lil bitch — the kind of person who gets mad at chief keef for existing — the kind kind of person who freaks out when her book club meeting runs out of Brie puffs — sucka dick u uptight bitch – DMN 4EVA

  23. Blahblahblah

    God, this is a waste of time. I’m offended by people who love nothing more than to be offended. If you don’t want strangers to have sexual thoughts about you, don’t become the singer in a band. Maybe it’s actually a GOOD thing that entertainers these days can so easily know what their public is thinking. If you choose not to know, don’t look.

  24. Joe Music Exec

    She’s not wrong. DMN is a joke. The overt agendas displayed by DMN are laughable.

    • TuneHunter

      You must be from Universal – the house of free ubiquity!
      They love this word – for important guys it means “cash”, I guess, or jus makes them more important.

  25. Karen Allen

    Kristen’s right. Here’s why.

    1. This is a news site. It’s right there in the title. The article was not identified as an opinion. So, to put an opinion in there is sloppy journalism and totally irrelevant to the article. If DMN doesn’t want to be held to journalism standards, then change the name to Digital Music Happenings or something.

    2. Lauren Mayberry may not be able to stop pervs and idiots from posting sexually aggressive stuff on the band’s socials, but she absolutely has a right to speak up about it. It’s basic first amendment, it’s basic feminism. If we just shrug our shoulders when a gender or race is oppressed, then that oppression becomes the norm and continues or worsens.

    3. Going after Lauren for speaking up about the pervs and idiots is just shaming the victim. Ask rape victims about that. Many rapes go unreported because the victims are the first targets for blame – what did she do to incite it, was she drunk, etc – nevermind that rape is wrong, period, end of story. Same goes for speaking up about pervy comments. Lauren speaks up about it and she’s told to suck it up, that’s just fame, you brought it on yourself. Kristen speaks up about it and she’s told to STFU. What about entertaining the idea that yeah, those comments are really fucked up and maybe should not be tolerated? Also, I looked at the Chvrches videos and there is nothing overtly sexual about Lauren. I get it if others objectify you when you are objectifying yourself (hello Miley, Madonna, Gaga…). That is not what’s happening with Lauren.

    4. Women are very sexualized in the media, even women who are not overtly sexual themselves. As a woman, a healthy amount of your value is how you look, how sexy you are, and how well you age. We are not going to get past this if we turn a blind eye to the pervs and idiots whose posts are sexually aggressive towards women and back up the objectification of women.

    5. No one thinks that Lauren speaking up is going to stop anything completely. But, it puts the conversation on the table and opens the dialogue for awareness of how one’s actions affects others.

    I don’t know Priscilla, but I am a bit horrified that a woman (especially a woman in journalism) is so glib about the topic. Maybe it’s a side effect of growing up in the Girls Gone Wild era (she looks like she could be of that generation in her picture). Objectification has been out of control with the Millennials and the girls themselves bought into it. It will take years for them to get their power back.

    The power of the pen is mighty and those who wield it have a great responsibility. Priscilla may be more careful about blowing off sexism when she is older and has caught the blunt end of it herself. Until then, let’s keep the news to news. In case any DMN writers need a refresher on journalism, here’s the Society of Professional Journalism’s Code of Ethics:

    • Really?

      Comparing anonymous comments posted on a web page to rape is disgusting and an insult to anyone who has been sexually.

      • Karen Allen

        I did not compare comments with rape. Read it again. I said the treatment of those who are speaking up about the comments is the same treatment that rape victims get for speaking up about their rape. They are both told that they are responsible for the actions of others. In the case of Lauren, she’s famous so what did she expect? In the case of a rape victim, they were pretty/sexy/there so what did they expect? In both cases, the woman gets heat and the abuser/poster is validated.

        • Really

          You are still comparing how a victim of a criminal act responds to the crime to how a person reacts to anonymous comments posted on a web page. Now I admit that I don’t know if the posted comments were of the type that should be reported as a crime but Really? You are still comparing rape to some obnoxious anonymous comments.

          • Karen Allen

            Again, you are not understanding what I’m saying. I am not talking about the victim’s reaction. I am talking about how others treat the victim. In both cases, the victim is getting blowback for someone else’s behavior. My point again below, emphasis in all caps:

            “I said the TREATMENT of those who are speaking up about the comments is the same TREATMENT that rape victims get for speaking up about their rape. THEY ARE BOTH TOLD THEY ARE RESPONSIBLE for the actions of others. In the case of Lauren, she’s famous so what did she expect? In the case of a rape victim, they were pretty/sexy/there so what did they expect? In both cases, THE WOMAN GETS THE HEAT and THE ABUSER/POSTER IS VALIDATED.”

          • Really

            I am sure the victims of rape and the accompanying psychological trauma will be comforted with the fact that Lauren Mayberry is being treated the same when she comains about nasty comments she received on the open comment section on her bands website

          • hippydog

            Quote ” You are still comparing rape to some obnoxious anonymous comments.”

            They were not random obnoxious comments..
            The were misogynistic comments, with the point of view that its ‘OK’ to treat females this way..
            A point of view that seems to be widespread IE: “its just the internet”, “they are just trolls”

            and yes.. the two things are connected.. Misogynistic comments on the internet and how they are handled are a microcosm of how society handles rape..

            Quote “Comparing anonymous comments posted on a web page to rape is disgusting and an insult to anyone who has been sexually assaulted.”

            Its just a guess.. but anyone who read the entire (original) article, IS a female, HAD been assaulted, may not have the same opinion as you do.. Anyone, with a shred of empathy, would not be calling those just “anonymous comments”, like they were normal or something..
            just sayin…

          • Really

            I disagree with this over generalized statement:

            “Misogynistic comments on the internet and how they are handled are a microcosm of how society handles rape..”

            The statement should be “Misogynistic comments on the internet and how they are handled are a microcosm of how society handles all other offensive speech on the internet.”

            Personally I believe, like the majority of most people that the crime of sexual assault of any kind against male or female is never justified. At the same time, I believe that a person, male or female who creates a forum on the internet allowing people to make anonymous comments must take the good with the bad no matter how vulgar the comments may be they must be accepted along with the comments that praise the writer.

          • hippydog

            quote “I disagree with this over generalized statement:”

            and then you generalize it EVEN MORE?

            I disagree with your weird need to trivialize it..

            Believe what you want.. Keep your head up your *** as long as you want..

            I know for a fact that keeping your head buried in the sand does nothing to fix things..

            If your not part of the solution.. your part of the problem..

        • Really

          I think I understand now. You were comparing how the victim of a brutal demoralizing crime is treated with the way the recipient of vulgar anonymous comments is treated.

          Got it

          • Really

            OK, I will cut the sarcasm so that you might understand my point.

            You are saying that the DMN article is trying to blame the victim the way that victims of rape are often blamed for being responsible or partially responsible for the crime the crime committed against them.

            I am saying that this comparison is inappropriate at best and insulting to real victims of crimes. Yes DMN is suggesting that Lauren should have expected this. It’s the internet and different moral standards apply. That is an argument worth having. However, the severity of the crime of rape is not comparable to being offended by vulgar language posted by an anonymous commenter. Maybe some of the anonymous comments rise to the level of criminal conduct, if this is the case then Lauren Mayberry should contact the police. Even so, the level of the crime of receiving threatening comments does not compare to the crime of rape.

  26. Yves Villeneuve

    To those critical of Priscilla Kim’s article: You do realize she is a female and may represent an equal portion of women similar in population to Kristen. When Kristen is asking an apology on behalf of every woman she is saying: “I’m more female than Priscilla.”

    I understand Kristen’s view but how often has she reported non work-related, non-threatening, idiotic sexual approaches? Did she report it every time or did she fear being called too sensitive? Yes, being too sensitive is a fault. In the name of feminism, it is better to appear resilient than weak, in my strong opinion.

    I’m guessing Lauren wanted to shame these guys to potentially stop it and create a viral phenomenon but how often can or will she use that ace in the future? My guess is possibly never, which means these messages possibly won’t stop. Has anyone asked Lauren if the messages stopped or have been significantly reduced, with evidence attached? If yes, then she has a good model for making the Internet more civilized. I’m not going to judge either way until reliable stats are in.

    Disclaimer: I did not read Lauren’s original post therefore don’t know her true intent.

    • Yves Villeneuve

      Lastly, these aggressive comments could have been reported to Facebook staff and they would have dealt with the said complaints. There are mechanisms in place to deal with abuse on Facebook. Teach your kids their options.

    • Pfftt

      Well, this is an article of journalism, clearly. That’s why DMN would never feature it. Think of this website like more of a blog with hyper-inflated importance of opinion, and a misleading name.

  27. Anonymous

    “In order for evil to flourish, all that is required is for good men (edit: people) to do nothing”

    Or maybe..

    “The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who in time of great moral crises maintain their neutrality.”

    Ok, I do not actually believe in Heaven or Hell and Kim has a point. The only problem is it is a weak and painfully neutral one, almost embarrassingly so. Kim is right, if you really do not like the access to contact you social media provides, turn it off. But as the human race becomes more overwhelmingly connected as a community online, continually turning a blind eye to behaviour that would not be accepted otherwise will possibly lead to a greater acceptance of misogynistic leanings in the real world (for want of a better term). No one wants that, I know I do don’t. Crude ending statement but here we go, if an attractive woman walks down the street and is subjected to a vile outburst of sexist language from a male, is it her own fault for being physically attractive? No, of course not, so draw the line with a big f*ckin’ tin of paint, not some chalk you can rub out when it suits you.

    • Yves Villeneuve

      Keep in mind, Priscilla was referring to instigators who no where near their target of vile language.

      Everyone should re-read her article. Her message is simple: don’t be too sensitive toward non-threatening messages, no matter how instigating they can be.

      The example Lauren Mayberry used was about potentially “making superior love” with her and asking her out on a date. She hid this guy’s picture. Could it be a nerd spilling his feelings with machoism in an effort to go out with a woman, assuming he lived in the vicinity? A lot of women love innocent expressions of machoism and confidence. Apparently, Lauren Mayberry does not. I hardly call these disgusting unless the guy’s appearance is repulsive or she’s a homosexual. Nonetheless I would have ignored it if there were no interest. If a hot woman had said that to me, I would have checked out her profile and her photo albums, assuming of course I’m single.

      Beautiful men/woman get more attention. Ugly men/women get more rejection. Par for the course. A vile person will make vile comments, a decent person won’t.

  28. Adam

    DMN is correct in standing by this article. The entire point of those comments is related to trolling. Before getting all up in a huff and screaming sexism, STOP FOR A SECOND and look up the definition of trolling. If you can’t deal with trolls, you FAIL as a musician, as someone who exists in the public space, and as a “celebrity” of any type. I’m not suggesting that the behavior is positive or should be considered acceptable. Its the REACTION that matters. Smart people know you don’t feed trolls online. They exist specifically to start these kinds of debates and get people all riled up. Stop being victims of trolling and live your lives. Move on. Don’t argue it or discuss it, you just FED THEM MORE. Do you understand???

    • Anonymous

      You say, “I’m not suggesting that the behavior is positive or should be considered acceptable.” which is good, but the DMN article is saying that that behavior should be considered acceptable. Lauren took a stand and said she wanted it to stop, and DMN criticized her and said that she needs to get over it, not that it should stop. The DMN article says it’s inevitable and that Lauren, or anyone in her position, should just accept it (i.e. they consider is acceptable behavior). I don’t consider it to be acceptable behavior, so I am glad that Lauren decided to speak up about it, and I am sad that DMN decided to belittle her for doing that.

      • Yves Villeneuve

        With the exception of the screenshot Lauren Mayberry posted, the other messages she mentioned were simply an act of trolling, not “sexism”. The unacceptable behaviour Adam is referring to is Trolling, and so was Priscilla… Not sexism, as you mistakenly identified.

        Take this next paragraph as possible act of trolling.

        I think you are a female trying to limit heterosexual mingling. Likely Lauren Mayberry’s intent as well, as per her screenshot she posted on Facebook.

        Look at trolling as entertainment, building a thicker skin and getting wiser of other people’s intent when they comment.

  29. Stephen

    I know Kristen. Calling her an executive at iTunes is not accurate. Eddy Cue is an executive at iTunes.

    • anonymous

      Sexist, no..misogynistic ..yes! Actually, Facebook does not answer reports of abuse or bullying and that is the real problem. Most social networking sites do not make the capacity to deal with this new way of bullying and so should not be disreguarded as “whining” as DMN carelessly states. Most artist’s would never mention this problem in public as it invites more haters as this article has proven . Tasless people exist, yes, but we are talking specifically about a NEW way to hate on artists and people in general, men and women, we should commend Lauren for being honest .…why shut down the discussion with more put-downs? It’s a careless remark on DMN’s part . The subject is worthy of an intelligent conversation as it has taken the lives of several teenagers and we really don’t know the effect it has had on public figures as online comment sections have invited more hateful comments only in recent years. It should be discussed and examined intelligently. Your opinion is valid as your misunderstanding is part of the problem artists face. It shows the ignorance surrounding comment sections, trolls, social network bully..and there is a vast amount of tangents this article could have went in other than shooting the messenger.
      Just because stalkers come with the territory does not mean their threat and the consequences of their threats on artists should not be discussed as to the impact , the consequences , what action one can take , whether putting moderators in place on social networking sights or other ideas that would hold trolls more accountable as hateful opinions seem to be on the rise in our culture.

  30. bitjumper

    I’m going to side with DMN on this one. I’m sure Justin Timberlake or Justin Bieber get millions of crazy fan mail messages like the one Chvrches girl received . _. its not just ladies. its the nature of anonymity on the internet!

    so jus be happy you have fans that like you enough to reach out like that, even if its a lil gross/weird/unsettling. Block em if you have to. Idk.


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